Personal empowerment is all about standing in your power and if you want to be an inspiration to others you need to do this utterly and completely. But, before you can stand in your power, you really need to own your power, and to do that, you need to know what that is.
I see too many people hiding or playing small because they do not realise how brilliant they are. There are a couple of reasons why this happens. Let’s look at three of them and what you can do about it.
1. Your training (or programming) during formative years – if you were told to stay in the background, not speak up, not show off……basically, stay in your place…then that can STOP you now from putting yourself out there.
You may not have been ‘told’ anything, but your experiences growing up were that when you did speak up or stand out then it was ‘not good’ – it might have been shameful, scary or even hurtful. Fear grows for exposing oneself, and one has been ‘trained’.
To deal with this, you want to identify your fear. What is stopping you from owning your power and sharing your brilliance? What are you afraid of? You might have to look deep and this is some of the most powerful work I do with clients – as it is not always easy to do on your own. Journaling can also help to get clear on the fears that are holding you back, so you can release them to be brilliant.
2. Comparison – we compare ourselves to others – from how we look to what we do. I know as an athlete I always compared myself to my fellow Australian beach volleyball players who were Olympic gold medallists. In comparison, I was JUST an Olympian. When I focused on what I was, and what I personally had achieved, away from any comparison, I could finally own my power and my brilliance.
This is the same in the world of coaches, speakers and entrepreneurs. There are other people doing what you do, and some have been doing it for longer, have more experience, excel in a certain way, etc.
When we compare ourselves to others, it can cause us to play small and to dim our light.
Instead, you need to shine the light brightly on yourself and compare yourself to YOU. Be aware of all that you are brilliant at. I’m a big fan of constant improvement, and with this mindset and comparing yourself to you of yesterday, or yesteryear, then you should see improvements. Celebrate that!
3. Lack of Discovery – I’m talking about self-discovery…to discover what you excel at. What IS your brilliance? Some people unfortunately get roped into doing what they think they should do, perhaps by family, or perhaps by peers. Perhaps they are persuaded by where the money is.
Your key to getting rich is discovering your brilliance. What do you find easiest to do? Often you find it so easy that you overlook it as being important. You assume everybody finds it that easy to do. You may not value it, but I can tell you – others will.
A couple of years ago I chose to focus on teaching personal leadership because it’s something I find easy to do – to take charge of my life and to take action on my goals. It’s a part of me, and a big part of my coaching, helping others to plan, to stay on track and achieve their goals. More recently I have refined that again to focus specifically on speakers, and entrepreneurs that need to speak. The personal leadership is a big part of getting out and speaking, but it also helped me to really tap into my deepest gift – which is to Connect.
Self-discovery is a never ending process as you go deeper and deeper, and it starts with answering questions. Here are some questions to prompt your own self-discovery:
- What are you good at?
- What do you find easy to do?
- What do you love to do? (you would do it, even if you didn’t get paid.)
- What were your easiest subjects at school?
- What jobs did you excel at?
- What specific part of a job did you excel at?
And yes, you are most likely brilliant at more than one thing. You might even see a connection between different skills.
Identify your fears, stop the comparison and discover your own personal brilliance – do this fully so that you can go out and be the inspiration to others. Change in the world starts with you.